My life if funnier than Jerry's

I was an hour early for a meeting on W108th and Riverside.  

I wanted to find a place where I could get an ice  coffee to go and pee that was not a Starbucks.  It turned out that was Tom's Restaurant, the mythical diner where Steinfield and his friends often ate.

They only charged me 75¢


If I were Jerry:  The entire episode would be about the fact that he was going insane of the fact that he was undercharged.  No sleeping,  loss of applicate maybe even impotence.


If I were George:  I would get together with Newman and sell ice coffee at a markup to people in Midtown.


If I were Kramer:  The episode with end with him marrying the cashier.


If I were Elaine: The entire episode would be about the fact that she was going insane of the fact that he was overcharged.  No sleeping,  loss of applicate maybe even impotence.