Friday, February 11, 2011

Because I am 47, that's why!

It is getting real ugly
In my kids school the teachers of each grade all have a meeting every other week.  At that time the students in that grade have "Grade Recess".  One hour of glorious mayhem in the "backyard".  For the past 2 and a half years the highlight of my every other week has been when I volunteer there to help out.  Two years ago I wrote this

I was given no training, I was not asked to sign anything,  no instructions.  Only "Keep your back to the wall, a loose ball can give you a concussion."  I like it that way, it makes my job easier.  I can look at a kid who is getting a little kooky and threaten them with being panted in front of their class.   They say you can't pants me, you will get in trouble."  I say what are they gonna do, tell me not to come back next week?  I don't work here, I don't get paid...  What a great job.

When my kids were in third grade I tied shoes and walked kids to the nurse (once my own son!).  If forth grade I picked kids up and told them to tie their own shoes.  Now it is fifth grade and some of these kids are getting hormones.  So I break up fights.  I did that a lot in my old "real" job, but then my students were big hairy men.  A few weeks ago this little kids was punching a big kid in the face.  He had to jump up to reach his face.  But he just kept swinging.  The big one did not want to have anything to do with it, but he was kinda cornered and could not get away.  I ran over and put the little kid under my arm and delivered him to the teacher in charge.  I did not put him down, I just said, "This is the kids who was doing all the hitting and I saw the whole think, he was entirely unprovoked.  Where do you want me to put him?"  The kid said "I didn't do nothing"  I looked him right in the eye and said "shut up".  I like not being on payroll.

But today was the best.  I got to do what EVERY fifth grader wanted to do.  I got to play on the snow.  It is not even snow anymore, it is a giant ice mountain .  The kids know to stay off the ice, but their balls do not.  For 45 continuous minutes I walk back and forth on this pile of ice and gave the kids their balls back.

I only fell once.

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